What babies really think

Awake Training for Parents: 



Dear Fellow Babies,

OK, here's my situation. My Mommy has had me for almost 5 months. The first few months were great -- I cried, she picked me up and fed me, anytime, around the clock. Then something happened. Over the last few weeks, she has been trying to STTN (sleep thru the night). At first, I thought it was just a phase, but it is only getting worse.

I've talked to other babies, and it seems like its pretty common after Mommies have had us for around 5-6 months. Here's the thing: these Mommies don't really need to sleep. It's just a habit. Many of them have had some 30 years to sleep -- they just don't need it anymore. So I am implementing a plan. I call it the Crybaby Shuffle.

It goes like this:

Night 1 -- cry every 3 hours until you get fed. I know, it's hard. It's hard to see your Mommy upset over your crying. Just keep reminding yourself, it's for her own good.

Night 2 -- cry every 2 hours until you get fed.

Night 3 -- every hour.

Most Mommies will start to respond more quickly after about 3 nights. Some Mommies are more alert, and may resist the change longer. These Mommies may stand in your doorway for hours, shhhh-ing. Don't give in. I cannot stress this enough: CONSISTENCY IS KEY!! If you let her STTN (sleep through the night), just once, she will expect it every night. I know it's hard! But she really does not need the sleep; she is just resisting the change.. If you have an especially alert Mommy, you can stop crying for about 10 minutes, just long enough for her to go back to bed and start to fall asleep. Then cry again. It WILL eventually work. My Mommy once stayed awake for 10 hours straight, so I know she can do it.

The other night, I cried every hour. You just have to decide to stick to it and just go for it. BE CONSISTENT! I cried for any reason I could come up with:

-My sleep sack tickled my foot.
-I felt a wrinkle under the sheet.
-My mobile made a shadow on the wall.
-I burped, and it tasted like rice cereal. I hadn't eaten rice cereal since breakfast, what's up with that?
-The dog said "ruff". I should know. My Mommy reminds me of this about 20 times a day. LOL.
-Once I cried just because I liked how it sounded when it echoed on the monitor in the other room.
-Too hot, too cold, just right -- doesn't matter! Keep crying!!
-I had drooled so much my sheets were damp and I didn't like it touching me.
-I decided I was sick of all the pink in my room so I cried.

It took awhile, but it worked. She fed me at 4am. Tomorrow night, my goal is 3:30am. You need to slowly shorten the interval between feedings in order to reset your Mommies' internal clocks.

Sometimes my Mommy will call for reinforcements by sending in Daddy. Don't worry Daddies are not set up for not needing sleep the way Mommies are. They can only handle a few pats and shhing before they declare defeat and send in the Mommy.

Also, be wary of the sleep sheep with rain noises. I like to give Mommy false hope that listening to the rain puts me to sleep sometimes I pretend to close my eyes and be asleep and then wait until I know Mommy is settling back to sleep to spring a surprise cry attack. If she doesn't get to me fast enough I follow up with my fake cough and gag noise that always has her running to the crib. At some point I am positive she will start to realize that she really doesn't really need sleep.

P.S. Don't let those rubber things fool you, no matter how long you suck on them, no milk will come out.

Trust me.

Sincerely,
Baby B

I'm not sure of where I found this.. but whom ever the author is, did a brilliant job!  Thanks for sharing the baby perspective on sleep training!  

My newborn baby won't sleep!

Welcome to parenthood!  Those first few weeks of parenting are really, REALLY tough.  And, YES, you've gotten plenty of unsolicited advice about sleep, eating, and whatever else a baby needs.  But the bottom line is- you are tired!

What can you do to help your baby sleep?   First, relax and breathe.  When you are stressed or anxious- and we all get that way as parents- just stop and breathe.  Your baby will pick up on your feelings of anxiety or frustration  and sometimes that can cause more crying  for you and baby.

Create a healthy routine for your baby to get 15 hours of sleep in a day.   Newborns don't have an internal clock so you can't set it, but creating predictable routines calms your baby.  When your baby wakes up, nurse or bottle feed, then play and do some tummy time, and then put your baby down for sleep.

Create nap time and bedtime rituals that eliminate feeding to sleep.  Reading a book, singing soft songs, gentle tickling, touching to connect and loving  on your baby are wonderful ways to help you little one drift off to sleep.

Hold, snuggle, cuddle your baby during the day.  Don't worry about spoiling a baby, because you can't.  The more holding and snuggling you give your baby during the day- the better sleep your baby will have at night when they are away from you.

Remember a baby that sleeps 4-6 hours in one stretch is considered to be sleeping through the night during the first few months.  Newborns still have a need to feed during the night so don't withhold feedings. Be sure to discuss any changes to your feeding schedule with your pediatrician.

Enjoy, delight, and bond with your newborn baby!

Math- It's not so scary!

Math is so much more than numbers!  It’s about real life skills that we use every day! 

So what is the best way a parent can instill the love of math?  Start young and make it real.  Our children are a clean slate, a new sponge, and they are equipped to learn.  But don’t sit down with your child and flashcards or worksheets, just PLAY!

• A baby delights at the sound of your voice.  They love listening to everything you have to say.  So while you are counting your babies toes, fingers, pointing out their body features and saying “where are your 2 ears?  One, two.   Where’s your nose?  Uh, you have 1 nose!  Touch your knees, One Knee, Two knees… you are not only introducing math- but connecting with your child.
• Now your toddler and/or preschooler is ready to explore and learn all about the world around them.   Keep counting toes, fingers and body parts, but now it’s time to investigate.  Get on the ground and build with blocks.  Count, arrange, stack, sort, collect in a container or bag.  Use balls or other simple toys to repeat and reinforce the concept.
• Get your child involved with cooking.  Talk about reading the directions for the recipe.  Show them how to measure out ingredients and make something delicious.  This is an easy way to introduce your child to measurement and fractions without making it scary.  Involving them in the process shows your child how essential math is for everyday life.
• Identify numbers.  Addresses, phone numbers, price tags, or just count.  Kids love numbers. 
• Give me 5 or 10, or 100.  Skip counting is an easy way to introduce multiplication.
• Getting ready for a home improvement, involve your child in measuring out the room.  Introduce them to a ruler, measuring tape, and talk about the numbers and the importance of these tools. 
• Point out geometric shapes in your home and in nature.  Count the sides and identify the characteristics.  This flower looks like a circle, it’s so round. The stop sign is red and it’s an octagon.  What does octa mean?  Can you make a square with those rocks?
• As your child gets older they are ready for equations and word problems.  Set up the situation.
• I have 3 strawberries and you have 4.  How many do we have all together?
• Let’s eat our snack.  You have 10 pretzels.  If you eat one, how many will you have left?  If you eat another one, how many will you have left?
• Don’t’ forget to sing and dance about math too!  Those monkey’s on the bed and other finger play that introduces numbers, counting up and down.

Math is all around us and should be something easy to share with your child. Take a moment to explore your surroundings and think of all the math lessons you can share with your child!  They’ll be excited to play with you; you’ll be excited to teach your child simple math principles that lay a strong foundation for learning and enjoying math!  Through simple play during the first 5 years of your child’s life, it will become second nature to know and understand math and your child.  It’s not so scary!

Help my baby sleep!

A common request by many parents!  Yes, Loving Lessons is here to empower and support a family when their child is not sleeping through the night.   You don't have to do the Ferber method and let your child cry it out, but you can do it in a  loving and  gentle way so your child can sleep, and you still get the sleep you need too!  Helping children sleep is not a one size fits all solution. When teaching your child to sleep, it's important to take into consideration your child's temperament, age, developmental needs, parenting styles, routines, and schedules.  Healthy sleep habits now, are the foundation for healthy sleep habits later in life!

Loving Lessons offers consultations and classes in your home or via Skype.  A new service available is the  Sweet Dreams Class which is a one hour sleep education, filled with tips and strategies for your child's age, and a question and answer session. Learn more about services available by visiting Loving Lessons Pediatric Sleep Consulting.

This is a great time to help your baby sleep because on Cyber Monday, Plum District is offering $50 vouchers to use towards any consultation or solution option for $25. Learn more about this offer by visiting the Plum District- For Moms, By Moms.

And yes, now you can learn how to help your baby sleep -by sleep training your child in a loving and supportive way!

Dare I say the naughty words- Sleep Training!

I did!  I did say sleep training and these seem like naughty words in most parenting circles.  Number one question parents ask parents- "How is your baby sleeping?"  It makes parents uncomfortable, lie, make up sleepy tales about the sleep they think they have or wish they had, or they keep the talk minimal because if you even knew what was going on behind closed doors!  YIKES!

What some parents fail to realize is that our children are a clean slate.  Everything and I mean EVERYTHING they learn is from us.  As parents we have so much influence in our child's little life.

When I'm talking about sleep training, I'm merely speaking of the healthy habit I hope you teach your child- how to sleep.  During the night we go through different sleep stages/cycles and we have a partial arousal.  As adults, we might reposition ourselves, turn over, or just adjust the covers.  For children that don't know how to go back to sleep without some sort of crutch or association  (bottle, pacifier, rocking, holding/snuggling with mom or dad), they wake and are ready for the next part of their day. And as the parent- you're not because it's the middle of the night and you are thinking- GO TO SLEEP.  Although- Adam Mansbach did write a book with a few choice words I'm sure we all may be thinking... there's no way our children learn this skill unless we take the time to teach them. 

Here's what sleep training does NOT mean.  It does not mean break out the Ferber method and just let your child cry it out.  Nor does it mean you are a terrible parent if you can't hold or attend to your child's every cry or your child will be scarred for life if they cry.  We are human - so that in itself makes us imperfect, but more importantly we are parents and there is room to grow and learn how to help our child develop these healthy habits.

Many times I'm asked- how do you teach children how to sleep?  My approach with each family is unique- as each child has his or her own needs.  It means I need to learn about the child, the family, parenting styles, temperaments, and the sleep history.  My role is NOT to judge or criticize.  Believe me when I say I have been there and done that.  Desperate times call for desperate measures.  We all have the crazy sleep story of how we got our baby, toddler, or preschooler to sleep.  But my goal is to come up with a gentle, creative solution that you and your family can live with and follow through.  But more importantly, I hope you walk away with tools for your parenting toolbox to empower you as you go through the journey of parenting. 

If you have a young child, my wish for you is to make sure your child knows how to sleep. Read a book, talk to your pediatrician, or contact me, a sleep coach to help support your family's sleep needs.  You have to train up your child in so many ways, and don't forget sleep is just one of them!

Get ready to FALL back!

Daylight Savings Time ends this Sunday!

As adults we love this time of year: the leaves change color, the chill in the air, and the extra  hour of some zzz's!   But for our children, it's a little more work to reset their internal clock.  There are two ways to help your child make it through the change and get their sleep!

Start TONIGHT if you plan to make a gradual change in your child's routine. This is helpful for children who have a more alert temperament, children who may be more sensitive to being overtired, or who tend to wake up early. Bedtime should be 15 minutes later than usual tonight, 30 minutes later tomorrow night, 45 minutes later on Friday night, and an hour ...later on Saturday night. You need to move the wake up time 15 minutes later each morning too. Try to expose your child to as much sunlight as possible in the few days following the change.

Enjoy your extra hour of zzz's!

When your a MOM, you're a ROCK STAR!

If you're a mom, then you have achieved ROCK STAR status!  I'm not sure who wrote this piece, but I love it and makes me think of my daily life with my boys- I couldn't imagine not being a ROCK STAR! Where else am I loved and adored so much? 

I live the life of a rock star. It’s true! I have wild hair and make up with frequent costume changes.

Everywhere I go I have an entourage. People are constantly yelling my name. I look out into the crowd and they’re actually crying for me, reaching for me.
I have no privacy. I’m watched when I shower, when I’m cooking, even when I use the restroom… for my own protection I’m sure.

When I go places I must do so quickly before my fans get out of control and start a riot. Every night a different guy wants to sleep with me. Each of them seems genuinely hurt when I turn him away.

Occasionally I get dirty underwear whirled at me with a whoop and a smile. It’s even hard sometimes to walk through my own home without someone spotting me and trying to grab my legs or my clothing.

Oh, and don’t forget about the stalkers! You know those crazed fans that follow you everywhere? Why, I can’t even talk on the phone in the pantry without an eye or two peeping at me.

Yes, it’s true- I live the life of a rock star. And this goes out to my biggest fans- Connor & Bailey- thank you for making my debut so special!!